Lawyer Change

(Dear Universe: I am not a gymnast. Please lighten up.)

Photo: Trees Bloom

I got an email from my Workman Comp lawyer’s office.

Here it is:

Holly – I am covering the hearing on Monday regarding the 3/15/24 injury. I will call you that morning to go over any last minute details.

Feel free to respond to this email with any questions – I will answer them when I call you Monday.

So, I must have a new lawyer covering my hearing on Monday?

How could this cold introduction be right – He will respond to any questions – on Monday?

I wrote out my response, then didn’t send it right away. Liz came over to help me around the house and deal with paperwork. She read over the letter and had me add a few things.

I emailed the note below, then refused to think about this for the rest of the day. I had enough going on.

My new mantra: No New Drama.

Maybe it’s me, but it seems like every step of my ongoing disability is riddled with backwards twists.

(Dear Universe: I am not a gymnast; stop trying to twist me into a pretzel. Please lighten up.)

Here is the email I sent to my newest legal representative.

Hi B.

Are you a lawyer?

What happened to S, the lawyer who ran my last hearing?

What an odd way to learn that I have ANOTHER lawyer/representative.

Are you familiar with my case? At all?

Are you aware that I have not been able to drive at night for two years or drive at all for over a year? Do you know that my house will close in the next two weeks -- because I got injured at work and can no longer afford to live here?

Are you aware that I suffer serious depression / anxiety--I cry a lot. Did you know that after 10 minutes of screen time my pain increases? Do you know that I must type with my eyes closed? Has anyone told you that my short-term memory is SHOT, especially when it comes to anything with math or numbers?

Are you aware that my social security disability starts in May--I will get less than 2,000 a month for that. Does it matter to you that the social security administration decided that I could not manage my own money and had to get a payee -- I fought it and they backed down. (I pay friends to help me pay bills, etc.)

Are you aware that I have a number of diagnoses including optic perineuritis, mild cognitive impairment, depression, anxiety, several kinds of arthritis, crazy eye pain, digestive issues, skin issues and more? Yes. ALL OF THIS IS FROM THE INJURY. Sorry to shout. I will return to crying now. Sobbing.

I will go from owning a 3 bedroom + (with a small apartment) house on a creek where I used to kayak and host dinner parties to renting a room in a 2-bedroom, 1 bathroom apartment in.... wait for it.... Newburg. Because I can afford to live there and because it is walkable and I have a few friends nearby who can continue to support me. There is not a better option for me. I must leave my family and an extended network of people who help me here.

Newburg is the best I can do.

On Monday, this hearing might just be a small part of your day, but for me it will determine if I must live below the poverty line for the rest of my life as my health continues to deteriorate.

Funny thought: I tried to sign up for low-income housing and was told that I don’t make enough money to live there. Yeah. Hysterical fact. Though maybe we needed some levity. I tried to tell the low income housing authority that I will have money to live on when I sell my house, but this doesn’t count. They only count the money coming in.

More good news: though nobody can explain why... I still have my logic skills, as the testing has shown. Also, I can still express myself by writing. I am not able to represent myself well verbally. I get mixed up. The wrong words come out of my mouth -- and I can’t tell. And then I lose my train of thought fast. And I can’t tell if the wrong words come out of my mouth... so get confused when people try to correct me.

I have trouble focusing and paying attention. I will literally be pinching my leg as hard as I can during the hearing to help me focus. This effort of focusing will take all of my energy and I will fall asleep. I will try not to sleep during the hearing. As mixed up as my brain gets, I am able to express ideas in writing. Though this takes a long time for me to express this way, it is my gift right now.

You may be interested to know that I have only continued to see one doctor, the eye doctor in Boston, as suggested by Stacie. He has done two eye biopsies in the last two months. No results available, yet.

Attached are for recent forms for the file.

Please let me know if there is more that you need at this time.

Right now, I have a friend here supporting me in writing this note.

Thank you for listening.

Holly

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Welcome to my long days. I’m glad you’re here.

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If you want to start at the beginning of my Long Days of Holly Journey, read the posts from the bottom UP. Click HERE.